he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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