i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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