how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
NoShamevember. You game?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
