Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
