are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
