A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
