wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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