A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
And then he peed in my hair
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