No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
