hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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