rhymes with "ouble enetration"
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize