I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
COCAINE IS GR8
Randomize
