guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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