I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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