My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize