We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
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