I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
