My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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