I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
