Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
