11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
