you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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