Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
