Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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