i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize