He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize