dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
