My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize