i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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