He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
