***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
