Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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