Grow some girl-balls and come out already
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
