Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
