She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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