either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
he told me I talked like a deaf person
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
