i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
