Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
