I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
