please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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