so that wasnt chicken after all
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Randomize
