dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
