seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Randomize
