i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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