part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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