And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
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