New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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