Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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