when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I stole a fireplace last night.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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