yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Randomize
